Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Hey there just checking out Siri and giving her a test run daycare we'll see you back in Chicago love you

Monday, May 30, 2011

living in oblivion | anything box

Living In Oblivion | Anything Box

You can't hide the pain,
I can see it scrawled on your empty face.
And I feel the hurt,
It's in the words you say, they make me want to...
Scream out to the world,
For taking life for granted and I know.
You are by my side when
I turn to hear you cry

I am so afraid of living in oblivion
Living in oblivion

Am I so blind?
With my eyes turned to a different time or hour.
At the end of the day,
When we both run down and our hopes are heavy...
Tell me what you will,
'Cause I've got to know the truth inside of you.
Can you hear what I say,
When I hold you and you scorn the day?

I am so afraid of living in oblivion
Living in oblivion

So I ask again,
Am I so alone and full of pride?
To never speak out...
This is my world, this is my world
Don't tell me now,
I won't feel those words, I won't feel the lies they tell
Can you hear my scream?
It's for everyone, for everyone...

I am so afraid of living in oblivion
Living in oblivion...

Friday, December 17, 2010

i am my new home

Amazing how lighting three little candles can be a gesture of such fecundity. Staying the weekend at my sister's in northern Illinois. Outside it's frigid and white. Inside I'm protected and inspired by familial love. I am my new home.

Chicago. I'm here. Finally. I've moved back to where I grew up, where I was educated, where I was cultured.

Pragmatically it's in hopes of finding a job. Millions of us Americans are suffering for lack of it, for lack of a life. It was hard in Los Angeles for me despite living comfortably, surrounded by love of family, always well fed. But again I felt I was in limbo there. I had merely had a shell of a life.

It all begins with a job, a sense of independence, of owning one's life. But considering how many moronic and insular people in power, in government, have ruined things for the rest of us this looks to be a far more difficult struggle than it has ever been for me and many others in my situation.

I've survived - and championed - great and painful gauntlets in my life before. Perhaps that's why I don't feel as intimidated today. It also has to do with being lucky to have a very close knit family and a strong network of friends to help me, encourage me.

My gratitude to you all is bottomless. My heart glows and trembles with warmth, like the three votive candles I've lighted, keeping me company as I tap out this passage on my laptop on the kitchen table.

So begins a new adventure.